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11:11 a.m. - 2024-05-25
Has it been 7 years?
Hey, I'm back. After what, seven years? I was in Tibet, like Brad.

No, not really. Anyway, Covid came and passed, but before that, I got married too.

Why am I back? I guess I stumbled on my blog again while learning how to use the requests library from chatgpt. You know, we have AI now, since 2022 December or early 2023, where it helped me and my project mates in a BCG program.

The world has changed, and it's never going back to be the same again.

Have I changed? I think so... I hate this saying: "altered my brain chemistry", but maybe, maybe it has been altered.

What has happened in 7 years? It's 2024 now, by the way, thanks for waking up from your slumber in the space pod.

Well, a lot... I changed 3 jobs. From teaching, to community, to data or software, which I'm still trying to learn about.

I'm still the same though, making quick decisions, sometimes too rash, so I have to apologize and retract. A recent example was enrollling in a SIT course on cloud architecting and security, but then deciding the current 3 months commitment 2-3 times a night might be too much, since I'm also having almost daily night calls with an Argentinian guy to help me with deploying an app.

I'm still the same, afraid to say no to colleagues, and agreeing to rush work for them.

Anyway, by the way, the world has also recently discovered Palestine again. I'm still the same, interested in politics, religion and racial issues (e.g. in Malaysia), but I'm still sitting on the fence now. I think it's best to support both sides, for peace.

What else have I been up to? Actually, mostly studying... after I went for the programming bootcamp in 2017, I saw the younger peers, the ones who are really good, they go home after classes and continue studying on their own, so that's what I try to emulate.

But recently, I've also been pacing myself, because I think it's better to study strategically, like study stuff that can be more generally applied to other fields easily, like statistics or probability, rather than some obscure framework like Elm or blockchain.

Oh yes, we had a blockchain/NFT/cryptobros craze during this 7 years, you know?

This is an update and a documentation about what happened in the 7 years, I guess.
Anyway, I gotta get back to studying now, I'm reading Computer Networking: a top-down approach. It's quite interesting, about how the internet is linked by various networks and ISPs, and the various protocols, which you often come across like TCP/UDP, HTTP, bittorrent, etc., how they work. But okay, I wouldn't recommend you to read it unless you want to work in the field.

By the way, why am I in this field? If you remember, I was in scriptwriting and 'I want to be good in scriptwriting and write a movie that makes millions!'

Well, I'm here now entirely by luck and by sporadic effort in learning web development or blockchain during the craze and lockdown.

To be honest, I felt like my brain was more alert and able to think clearly during 2022, when I was ferociously learning blockchain programming and machine learning models, and math again. I never felt as clear-minded as when I'm thinking step by step, deciding on what's beneficial, like you know, whether to deploy money into some fixed deposit fund, or calculating annual interest rates on your insurance/investment fund, etc.

You know, math really does help you think clearly. Apart from that, I think it was also during my time at the Japanese tech company with my boss, when I started having more time at work. The thing about Japanese companies is they tend to make decisions slower, or they postpone the decision making, adopt a wait and see attitude first. That's not bad, you know, or maybe it's good for me personally, to have more time to process things too. To work and rework things.

I guess it was during that time, that my brain had the chance to recover from the stress of media/tv storywriting crazy constant writing/rewriting 2-3 years of that project which benefited only some the most. All the story writers in my team, almost all, crashed and burned and checked out.

Did I tell you, 4 months after I quit, while I was interviewing for another media job, I almost broke down while relating the story to the interviewer. As an afterthought, that was unneccessary.

But I think something broke in me after that burnt out experience. I no longer wanted to do scriptwriting or tv work. I think I struggled at it, writing dialogue and scenes. It was passable work, but to reach the levels of Oscar or Hongkong 80s/90s groundbreaking films, I don't think I'm able to do that. Not at the company, and not by my own independent effort or leisure time, as I find it laborious. Maybe I didn't find the process satisfying or fun, maybe I'd been lying to myself all this time: that I like writing stories. I guess I don't.

I do still like writing though, just writing my thoughts and letting it pour out. And watching it take form... Come to think of it, the time in marketing comms was quite 'effortless', as the work pace was manageable and the writing or comms strategy work just required you to have a clear goal and message behind it. Maybe I might go back to it one day, I don't know. I guess I usually leave companies because of overworking. I hope I can survive my current job. Gotta pace myself. And also tell myself it's not difficult. With experience, we can overcome it. And to learn from experience, when we have none ourselves, is to google. Because most of the problems we've encountered have been solved by others. Just keep googling. It happened recently, when the lead engineer was trying to help me debug a problem. He didn't know how too, since he wasn't familiar with the library, but he was experienced enough to use google. Although we didn't solve the database issue that night, if we'd kept googling using different keywords, we'd have found a solution. Because the next morning, that's how I found the solution online.

Alright, I have about maybe 21-22 more years till I'm 65, I hope that I can continue working and save enough money for retirement.

Okay, wait, let me end on a high note, my diaryland brother. You grew up and old with me, since I was 18 or 19.

Let me tell you a secret.

But no, I won't. I think I'll keep this secret smugly to myself, and I urge you to keep yours too.
This way, you or I will be superior in our secret knowledge.

Now, do you get it? (The secret is to keep some secrets.)

See you in another 7 years, maybe, my friend!


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