21:31:13 - 2001-01-27
school#4-i dun want to die.
(E) i don't want to die.
___After the whole ceremony in school,kafka and shawn had nothing else they thought better to do and they decided to go drinking again,as some kind of fun.
___the sky was grey and it began to drizzle and both of them walked out of school,with fear and anticipation of drinking on empty stomachs,with the knowledge that they would drink till they are unconsciously drunk,to see how far it goes.The funny thing about drinking though its not funny is that it always provides a good excuse for playing an exhibitionistic fool in front of the whole world to see and right now,as they walk chattily towards the super market,kafka and shawn,their hair wet and liberated by the rain,the sky unusually grey,laughed hysterically and spoke about class activities,about girls ,about where to go and get high upon drinking.
___"hey,we're drinking on empty stomachs,the effect would be greater!"
___"yeah,i haven't ate since morning,how about you?"
___"yeah,me too."
they got to the supermarket and checking the bottles and cans in the teenage tradition of picking the one with the highest alcohol level and which their money could afford,they bought a strawberry8% wine and two cans of beer and as they went down the escalator,they decided to go to the playground in the park where it is deserted and they could play on the swings and get high.kafka was most eager to get a can and drink it right there and then but shawn advised against it almost like a parent and so they walked the long way towards the park.when they got there,the rain had stopped but there were puddles of water in the hollows of the sand everywhere and they clumb like kids up into the shelter of the playpen and squatted down,the wine between them.
___"okay,let's see who can drink faster."kafka said,picking a can out of the
plastic bag.
___"okay lah! i always drink faster than you."
___"fuck you,let's see.. okay.one,two...three."
And they downed the cans of beer into their throats voraciously,enduring the lukewarm bitter taste,going down the throat like a guzzling ball.then they stopped and paused for breath ,tongues fingering the after taste,their stomachs churning sideways.
___"urghhh...i feel like puking",kafka said and stood up and rubbed his stomach with his left hand,his right hand holding the can of beer swishing the
unfinished sludge about.
___"yeah,it tastes bad,i think that's because they're not cold at all,"shawn gestured with the can in his left hand.
they looked at each other for a moment and remembering the competition ,they brought their cans to their mouths and drank halfheartedly,trying hard to ignore the nauseous feeling of vomit.on their third mouthful,they finished their cans of beer,almost at the same time,although kafka played cheat and emptied a few drops into the sand.
___"ar-fuck,taste like crap,"kafka said and held his stomach.
___"yeah."shawn gulped.
then they walked around a bit testily and kafka burped a few times.
___"how come you never burp?"he asked shawn and shawn replied,"i never burp."
___"ar..,let's go and play on the swings."kafka suggested and as shawn opened the bottle of strawberry flavoured wine and drank,he took it from him and they walked towards the swing.
___they drank more of the sweet gassy liquid;the bottle pessimistically half emptied and they sat on the swings and swung higher and higher up and down and up.shawn swung like crazy,flying higher and higher almost a roundabout.when they finished the bottle and stood around wondering what to do next and then they threw a few bits of wet clumpy sand at each other.kafka threw the bottle into a puddle of water with a splash and then squatted down by a puddle and washed his hands.
there was a sudden sound of smashing glass.
"fuck! what are you doing?"kafka startled and stared at shawn,the splintered glass bottle in his hand.
___"i don't know..kafka,i don't know! how come i got so violent?"shawn asked dramatically and stared at the broken bottle in his hand like a surprise.
___"ar-fuck,pick up the pieces..."kafka mumbled . they picked up the shards and pebblets of glass and put them into a plastic bag along with the empty cans and then scooped up some sand with glass bits
too small and threw them them in too.
___"let's go."
they got up and started to walk away from the playground.kafka took the
plastic bag and almost with a smile,smashed it glassily against the metal poles again and again till the glass bottleneck jutted out of the bag and then they tumbled out of the playground.shawn said his head was starting to spin and kafka angry-like because he had not felt anything yet.they walked towards the steps of the park,the plastic bag still in kafka's hands.they looked around for something and decided to climb up the tiled steps to the top of the small hill in the park.kafka threw the bag into a dustbin.when they reached halfway up,shawn's knees gave way and he fell sitting down onto the steps and they
laughed deliriously.
