12:14 a.m. - 2005-04-01
it rots near the end but its a start
one day i just woke up and had
An Imaginary Speech to my life-drawing class
I know I haven�t been drawing regularly on my own. I don�t have much to show for the development of my drawings�
But I�m glad that in this class I�ve been prodded, forced to move a few steps, in the journey and search of my own style.
I believe that all great art is about finding the self. This walk that we take. Detours and experiments and roundabouts.
What is this elusive self I speak of? It is not the pot of gold at the end. It is not a finishing line with cheering spectators.
The self is a biography, like Anthony giddens said. Its is like a book where you write the story of your life, the chapters and footnotes of digressions. To see it another way, it is a journey, it is how we carve out a route through the various choices we make in our lives. we could travel to a future if we wanted to and get back in time to place the welcome mat for our return.
How do you know that you are in the correct direction?
I have no clear answers�
The strictest answer I can give is that you must keep on the road, you must keep walking; the road is what spreads underneath your feet, going by you, going on and on�
Sometimes you see markers, little prints in the sand or bits of unwanted litter, you notice that the surroundings are somewhat familiar; you might have come here before, you are only going round and round.
Well, you are the only one that knows that and it is up to you to take a different step.
Yesterday I met a friend. He and his friends had made a video. It was about something. He disparaged it, I�m not sure why, maybe because it was not slick and smooth like those movies we see in the cinemas�
But I think it was still good. He had wrote the story himself and I think it is an interesting and unique story. There were bits of creative stuff in the plot that I had seldom noticed.
It is all subjective.
There are no standard answers.
How much of yourself have you put into your work?
I was someone editing words and I saw how different people write, how frank they are about their words or how they try to put words in a voice. I like the frank words best. Yet, when people put words in a voice, they also have their own reasons and I must understand that. It is still their voice afterall, no matter how veiled.
Hence I say that it is subjective. I might not like it, but I�m sure there are others who will.
Ok, I think I�ve come to the end of my thoughts.
Believe in yourself and put a little of yourself in what you do.
