10:28 a.m. - 2002-08-23
nonverbal communication #101
looks does matter
Despite everything your Dad told you about honesty and the values of diligence and sincerity, you will never survive the human world if you depend on these skills alone.
Welcome to Planet Earth (70% water, 30% land, 10% of the most obnoxious species:humans)
In this week's lesson on nonverbal communication, we shall be learning how to communicate ourselves better in order to express ourselves well so that others won't despise us secretly and name us poseurs behind our backs or even straight into our faces.
Section (a):
The Importance of Nonverbal Communication
70% of all communication happening between people are nonverbal; be it facial expressions, hand gestures, proximity, vocal pauses, touch or objectics: the study of the use of objects to express ourselves.
we shall be looking at objectics in more detail in our next section.
Section (b): Objectifying ourselves in a material world
In the ever-accelerating process of the commodification of everything( music, books, culture, traditions, and maybe even personalities: what do advertisements promise when they sell products? A better You. You can buy a new YOU!), humans are experiencing the world more and more through mediated means.
And how is this experience communicated?
By objects.(The tv, the radio, the newspaper; mass mediums)
What is the emerging mode of communication nowadays in this age of mass consumption?
Objects.(Our clothes, shoes, house, car, washing machine, brand of detergent...)
What will be the next available product to be mass produced and consumed and communicated?
The intangible.( Culture, traditions, music...)
Aren't we selling the Esplanade and Singapore as a regional Arts Cultural Hub? Rejoice! Arts students in Singapore can finally earn a decent living selling their art!(and souls.) Isn't this what you always wanted? Someone (the govt and somebody rich) to appreciate your hardworking efforts.
Section (c):Objects and your Inner-Self
All in all,this is the period of seeing ourselves and everyone as the total value of objects hung on their bodies.
This is nonverbal communication.
Even before you have spoken, you have been judged and appraised and a price tagged onto you. Most importantly, everything you have ever felt dear or true(even if there's a slightest hint of doubt), can be rendered ineffective and false by the way you dress, the way the look, the smell you smell and the coffee you drink.
And this is not happening just in the adult world. (though adults should be blamed for everything cos they were there first and they didn't solve it. ha!)
Teenagers and children are doing it too.
what brand of handphones? Which country's style of dressing to adopt? J-pop/rock/porn? Korean-dramas? Hiphop currypok?
Its all happening.
You are judged by the way you dress.
It doesn't matter who you are or what music you listen to or what values you have. It all burns away under the great vision of the eye.
"it doesn't matter if you like anything at all. one look at you and i know you're just a poseur."---the super statement.
Section (d):The religion has said it better
To solve this great paradox and insecure feeling you might have about anything right now especially your own self or maybe you're just too nicely safe in you self-righteous comfort...the religion has said it better:
the physical is ephemeral.
everything fades in the transcendental.
its all material.
to yield is to overcome.
but of course....
all said, "looks does matter."
no matter what religion you are from or adhere to or remotely care about, its always good to have a great looking mascot.
Section (e): The most practical section admist all these bullshit...who cares?!
Dress well.
Go to the gym often.
Indulge in sensible and soothing music preferences, preferably quiet jazz in a lounge.
Adopt a non-agressive, non-offensive stance towards anything offensive, unappealing and false to your senses.
Nevermind if you are false yourself.
Fake-laugh often...it helps life seem funnier and enjoyable.
Most importantly, never ever stay out of your league....a dumbass studious loser cannot listen to metal music.
