12:33 a.m. - 2009-02-24
A look at my professional life (BC)
Let me tell you about my job and my life.
Everyday i wake up at 8am sharp, get to the bus stop at exactly 8.30am and that's when i see the bus i want to take, bus 76, approach the bus-stop slowly, almost like an aeroplane about to land, there's tension in the air,
most of the people around me have been waiting for this bus for some time and you can tell everyone is a bit pissed and heavy with expectations, their faces light up as they see the bus and they move forward, to receive it with open arms. It's a festive parade, some people are waving little flags and cheering at the roadside.
And then at this point, Bus 76 suddenly picks up speed and just vroom... fly by us... and as it passes, you see people standing in the bus packed like sardines. There's a sound of many hearts breaking at once.
Some of the guys who have been waiting curse and spit on the ground. Some break down and cry because this is the 30th time in the month they are going to be late for work again and they are going to lose their jobs.
But not me. I'm all calm for one second. Then Bang! A gunshot is heard! And i throw my bag to somebody, it doesn't matter who, and i start running. The race is on! Because I am a professional bus chaser. And there are many just like me, competitors in this dangerous, extreme sport. Of Bus Chasing.
We chase buses and our aim is to get on them and bring them down, within the shortest time, the shortest distance and the lowest number of bus-stops passed.
I run, oh hell i run.
I see some guy waiting at a junction on a motorcycle and i just clothesline the bugger with my right arm. That's allowed under the rules set by the International Bus Chasers Federation, IBCF. YOu're allowed to clothesline some bugger and take off on their bike. It's allowed under the set of rules they drawn up. And preferably it's a Yamaha bike, because they're one of our sponsors. This whole event is televised of course.
Millions are watching. It's showing in America, it's showing in Singapore, even TV Mobile is showing it and the passengers on Bus 76 are following the show and probably rooting for me. For some reason, most fans of this rapidly-becoming-more-popular sport are morning commuters. They're usually the ones who cheer the loudest and paint their faces or stand in a row by the roadside with alphabets painted on their chest spelling out our names.
This is a glamourous sport, and like many other equally glamourous, (and mindless plus vain) sports, like bodybuilding and swimming and track n field, we have our share of drug scandals too. Just the other day, some guy was trying to peddle me some muscle stimulants so i can have bigger muscles and leap from car-top to car-top like little stepping stones.
Well, i don't know what i will be doing if i weren't in this sport. Bus Chasing is my life. It's been in my blood ever since the day i started attending secondary school in another neighbourhood where it's too far to walk. I will play my best until the day i have to stop, the day i hang up my bus chasing boots is the day when i find my bones shaking, my muscles aching,
and when i finally find a job within walking distance from my home.
